Payday is a Good Day
Mood:  happy
I am so happy to have gotten paid today. Most of it is gone already but it is nice to finally have a little bit of money. I am actually very thankful to God because B has been driving on empty for the past 2 days and he was certain he was going to run out before he could get me and take me to cash my check and then get gas. I prayed this morning while he was taking the baby in her school that God would watch over us and that there would be enough to make it to the gas station after I cashed my check. Sure enough we barely made it. We both think the car would have died very shortly. So I am thankful to God for watching over us. I am also thankful to my mom. She gave me a calling card a long time ago to use to call her when we had a house phone since she was long distance and I didn't have long distance on my phone. As B was taking me to work he was telling me how worried he was that if the car died on the freeway or on his way to get me that he had no way of calling me. Our cells have been shut off for a week now and we didn't even have .50 cents to our name so he could use a pay phone. I remembered about the calling card in my wallet and I gave it to him. Good thing it didn't come to that point and he didn't have to use it but I am still thankful that I had that card just to be safe. So with my paycheck we are going to turn our phones back on (YEA!) and he needs to pay court so he doesn't go back to jail. We are also going to get some food in our house (YEA!) and we need to pay the car payment. Like I said, it is pretty much all gone but it is still nice to know we can get some things taken care of that need to be taken care of.

Last night was another boring night for me. I just hung out at the house and watched tv. The baby was so good last night and we didn't have one problem with her. She was listening to us and obeying us every time we asked her to do something. She even went to bed with no problems and no crying. She did wake up at 4 this morning and came in our bed and tried to go back to sleep but couldn't. I woke up at 5 this morning to her saying "look momma, stickers!" that she pulled out of her pocket (I imagine she got them from her school) and then proceeded to put them all over my face. So I am extremely tired this morning because of all that but oh well. It is worth it to wake up and see that cute little face laughing at me cause I have stickers all over my face.

Things are pretty much the same with me and B. He still gets to me. One of the main things (I know I always say that, but there is a lot of "main things")is the way he is when something is missing. As soon as he finds out something is missing he always puts the blame on someone else. This weekend we had .75 cents missing for our laundry and he automatically blamed my younger brother saying he must have grabbed it. This morning he couldn't find any of his white socks that he swears he had like 12 pairs of but he could find a whole bunch of my older brothers socks (from when he used to live with us). Automatically my older brother must have switched socks so he can have the "better ones" (cause B is better than everyone else, you should know that by now). I told B that he borrowed socks from my older brother a few times when he lived with us but he says he didn't borrow that many. When I was seeing my counselor she told me a big problem in our marriage was I always stuck up for my brothers and never was on B's side, but I think that is a little absurd! I may be sticking up for my brothers but I don't see it in a bad way. I see it as showing B it's not what he always think it is. Just because something is "missing" (in other words, cannot be found at that very moment) he automatically finds a way to say someone else took it. Another example, his hubcap on one of his tires is missing. Just one. He doesn't know what happened but he believes the other car in our complex which is almost identical to ours took it cause that car was missing one as well. Turns out that other car was still missing its one, so he could not have taken it. B still believes that someone took it. Why would someone want one hubcap? I believe it fell off somewhere with the crazy way that he drives sometimes. His answer to that, "no, I don't drive that crazy and besides, I think I would have seen or heard it fall off". It just drives me crazy. So as you can see there is a lot to be fixed with this marriage and I am not sure how much more I can deal with. I do love him, and I do want to be with him, I just wish he wasn't the way he was. Is that so bad to feel that way?

Ok, enough of that. On other news, we are going to be getting another cat. My mom said a kitten followed her home the other day and I told her I wanted it. I hate the cat we have now, so I need one that I could love and call my own and teach this cat to be nice and not ruin other peoples things. Our cat is going to be so mad, but oh well. He will get over it. So my mom is bringing it down to me this weekend. I am pretty excited about that. I guess that is all for now. Have a great day everyone!